Today, I was a bad person.
Let me start by telling you all what the most obnoxious phrase in the English language is. It is 'just you wait'. FUDGE that drives me crazy!! This gets said to pregnant women in particular all the time. When you complain in your first trimester about being nauseous other moms laugh cloyingly and say 'just you wait until you're nauseous AND have heartburn AND have hemorrhoids'. In your second trimester when you complain that you're tired they say 'just you wait until the third trimester, you think you're tired now!' And now, in the third trimester, if I say ANYTHING they say 'just you wait until you have a newborn in the house'.
Now, I know that they're right but just because things get worse doesn't mean that your own current discomfort doesn't count. This, to me, is the same concept as when you're struggling with some problem in your life and people say 'but think about how many people out there have it worse!' See, that doesn't help. Then you could also think about how many people out there have it better! There are always people out there who have it better than you and always people who have it worse than you (unless maybe you're Job) but that in no way helps with your current situation. IN NO WAY.
The moms who say 'just you wait' always say it with that little half grin on their face like 'poor, sweet child thinks it's bad now, how cute and delusional'. So, people, it is really, really rude and frustrating to tell a pregnant woman 'just you wait'. Really. Rude.
That being said, Paul just called to tell me that he asked a co-worker today if she was okay because she looked really tired. Her response was 'Well, I am tired, I'm a mom to be!' Paul thought she looked awfully skinny so he asked her how far along she was and she told him that she was five weeks. He told me that and people I'm horrified to say that I laughed and said 'just you wait'.
2 comments:
Can I say "just you wait" and see if he's as sweet and lovable a baby as your husband was? Mom2
When people say "think of those who have it worse" it actually does work for me but in the wrong way. I think a kind hearted person would feel even WORSE when they hear that because then they would be thinking of poverty and famine and a whole bunch of terrible stuff that isnt' going away anytime soon. Selfishly though, it makes me feel better about what I have. Which is the desired effect when poeple say it - to make the person feel worse for others or selfishly better?
Reba
Post a Comment