Conversations With Paul

P - Yeah, I always wanted to be an Acidic Jew so I could spit acid at people I didn't like.

J - *blinkblink* What?

P - You know, an Acidic Jew, the kind that has those little curls...

J - *shaking with laughter* You mean, as opposed to a Basic Jew.

P - Right, or, maybe a neutral Jew whose ph is around 7.

J - *laughing hysterically* But you do know that its actually 'Hasidic Jew', right. HHHHA-sidic.

P - *silence*

J - *silence*

P - Really?

J - Yes, but you knew that right, you were kidding?

P - *very quietly* So, there are no Jews that can spit acid at people?

This brought us to a conversation about high school science...

P - I got an F in Freshman Biology cause we were sposed to make a terrarium and at the last minute I just grabbed a piece of pink paper that I found on the floor and drew fish on it. I got a 2 out of 10.

J - How did you get 2 for that?!

P - It had my right name on it!

J - Ah...geez.

A few minutes later.

J - Wait, if you were doing terrariums, why did you draw fish?

P - What do you mean? Oh, well it was like a water terrarium.

J - *the laughter starts again* Um, a 'water terrarium' would be an aquarium.

P - YES!! An aquarium, not a terrarium. We made them out of shoeboxes and stuff.

J - *pause* You put water in shoeboxes?

P - No, not water, it was just like scenes of underwater stuff.

J - *scratchscratch* You mean a diorama.

P - YES!