4:30 AM

I have been unable to sleep tonight so I am sitting here at the computer. I ran AdAware and Spybot, ran defrag and disk cleanup, deleted unused icons on the desktop, changed the wallpaper, checked all my survey websites, bank accounts, AdSense accounts, read all my fave blogs, played Tetris and Reversi and Igor. I have reached the end of the internet!

I've been busy lately with all sorts of things, including earning a fair bit of money this month in various endeavours...but as it always goes, the busier you are, the more you need to do to keep yourself occupied. My to-do list which is normally one or two pages of double columns is down to 7 things (icky things that I've been postponing for months, like washing the windows and blinds, but still!). Its frustrating because I know that as soon as we hear from the visa people it will be gogogo for a while again. But, until that happens, I'm bored!





Depression is always under the surface for me, but in general, I am fairly at peace right now. I couldn't sleep the other night but I was too sleepy to get out of bed. You know that feeling? So I rolled over and put my arm over Paul's back. He snuggled up against me and that woke up Smeagol, so she climbed up and forced her way in between our bodies, making little sighing noises of happiness. Nothing makes her happier than to be absolutely squished in between us. My arm was draped over her little back and my hand was on Paul's much bigger back. I ran my fingers across his shoulders and he smiled in his sleep. I thought 'this was what I was waiting for when I was single and lonely. This is what I thought everyone had'. Now, though, I realize that not everyone does have this. Not everyone is so lucky (and indeed some do not want this kind of luck). But, I am so lucky. I am so blessed.